Here’s Your Sign
I was a firm believer that there is no such thing as a stupid question. Man was that stupid! Because if ever I have discovered the well of never-ending “duh” questions/moments it is the 9 year old pre-pubescent male and honestly some adults I’ve run into lately as well.
I don’t know if it is because of all of the hormones that are raging that my once extremely intelligent “love bug” now has the IQ equivalent of a gnat most days but it seriously has me worried for his future on this planet because #1 I’m either going to shorten his life span significantly or #2 his inability to process information is going to get him splattered somewhere. But it does make me worry about the future of our world if pre-pubescent boys cause this much angst, what the heck do parents with little girls do?! It makes me want to go back and apologize to my parents, repeatedly. And what happens during REAL puberty, not this “pre” stuff? I may have to invest in some serious salon time because my hair will be falling out and turning gray daily.
Me, “Son did you see the pole you hit my car door on before it happened?” Son, “Yes, ma’am”. Me, “Son did it occur to you to not hit the car door on the pole”. Son, “No, ma’am.” Me, “Why not?” Son, “I don’t know.”
Me, “Son did you know if you left the front door open the dogs would run out?” Son, “Yes, ma’am”. Me, “Then why did you do it?” Son, “I don’t know”.
Me, “Son did you realize if you burned toilet paper in the candle it could burn the house down and hurt your hand?” Son, “Yes, ma’am”. Me, “Then why did you do it TWICE!” Son, “I don’t know”.
Me, “Son you realize it drives me bat crap crazy when you chew your food like a cow right?” Son, “Yes, ma’am.” Me, “Then why do you insist on chewing with your mouth wide open and sitting beside me when you do it?” Son, “I don’t know.”
Me, “Son you realize that the toilet in your bathroom is broken, it will be fixed tomorrow.” Son, “Yes, ma’am.” Me, “And yet it didn’t occur to you not to pee in it repeatedly and also go poo?” Son, “No, ma’am.” Me, “And why was that?” Son, “I don’t know.”
Seriously I have lost track of how much he doesn’t know about the completely insane things he says or does but cremini! But it did remind me of a popular comedian from years past named Bill Engvall and his perpetuity of the phrase “Here’s Your Sign” because most days I feel like saying that about 50 times a day and not just to my child. But at least with my child I can laugh and hopefully tell him he’s got to use his brain enough that eventually the message will stick, his hormones will catch up with his growth and he will again function as the incredibly intelligent person I know he is.
I think in a lot of ways, possibly due to the lack of community identity, the whole “it takes a village” thought process, that common sense has gone by the wayside because people don’t want to reach out to each other and say, “Hey dummy did you realize that if you took my $5.00 for the $4.97 I spent you only owe me $0.03, it doesn’t take a calculator, let me help you bless your heart.” I think we spend so much time running, running, running that we don’t slow down enough to help those that might benefit from the “Here’s your sign” mentality.
In applying this in the business world, as mentioned above, I have run into some doozies in the last couple weeks. While I am a firm believer in working smarter, not harder, it continues to amaze me that not everyone #1 understands what that means and #2 UNDERSTANDS WHAT THAT MEANS! And no, I am not talking about the people who work for me. Admittedly we all have our “blonde moments” (cough, cough Mary) but for the most part in our office we keep the “here’s your sign” moments to a minimum. But the people we encounter, which are legion, don’t always assign themselves to the same boundaries.
For the sake of anonymity let’s say that John called last week, and I happened to be the person who answered the phone. I answered the phone in the standard manner we have here, “Good morning Liberty County Chamber of Commerce this is Leah can I help you?” Poor John on the other end…”Can I please speak to Leah.” “Why yes this is Leah can I help you?” “Are you sure this is Leah?”—No you poor unfortunate soul I am quite certain it is not me, it is the other me.
And again last week someone insisted my name was Susan Poole and when I corrected her she again insisted it was Susan and not Leah. The only thing I could do was smile and hope that the expression on my face didn’t relay the message in my head because seriously “here’s your sign.”
Honestly going back through some of Bill Engvall’s work I was amazed all over again at what we have been reduced to…Caution Hot Coffee, Don’t Lick the Hairdryer, etc. One of his most popular quotes, “Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.” Amen brother.
-Leah Poole, CEO of the Liberty County Chamber & CVB